Poem: Will's Magic Potion Advert

Imagine that William Shakespeare were alive today. He might be writing the text for advertisements, catchy jingles that people will remember when shopping. Now imagine he got a job writing for the next diet craze...

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Blubber, blubber Toil and trouble Cellulose burn Under skin and stubble With Death by Chocolate and   Cold Champagne, Pickled herring, Your BMI Bane! When Fate brings heart attacks That soar and surge, Will a deadly rose help you Poison and purge? Grecian Formula for your hair, Contact lenses for your eyes, But what fool-proof plan appears in your head To handle those rotund thighs? My Cure-All Potion is what you Need, 100% Risk-Free Guaranteed. It will make those stones just melt away, Without making your wallet bleed. Trust me.